I don’t think there is any one single key to happiness, but I believe there are many of them. I am choosing to write about one of the keys of which I am currently struggling to find, but that I believe would bring a greater sense of personal happiness.
Self-worth.
Struggling with postpartum depression brought me to a very low place. My counselor, and most recently a psychiatrist, told me that I need to work on loving myself and growing my confidence. And I absolutely know that they are right.
I have had a perception of low self-worth in the past, so it’s not totally new to me. I was able to change that by doing things that made me feel better about myself, specifically with diet and exercise. Those two things opened many doors for me—I lost almost 90 lbs. and gained a more positive self-image, I ran many 5Ks, I was able to shop in “normal” stores, even chronicling that journey on this blog helped me grow my self-worth.
When we learn to accept ourselves, we acquire happiness. We stop worrying about what everyone else is thinking about us and the judgments they may be making. We become confident; not in a vain way, but confident in that we are happy being ourselves.
If we value ourselves, we will do things that make us feel good about ourselves. That could mean taking the time to exercise, eating right, and forming healthy habits. It could also mean wearing clothes that make us feel good, getting a pedicure, getting a massage, reading a good book, or taking the time to do something that we love to do. Maybe we put everyone else before ourselves most of the time and end up neglecting ourselves. To value ourselves, we have to learn that it’s ok (and healthy) to take time “me” time.
Both my counselor and the psychiatrist have told me that I need to practice positive self talk. I explained to the psychiatrist that I have been working on that but this weekend, I realized hours later that I had been thinking negative thoughts—at the time, I didn’t even realize I was doing it, but it was affecting me and my husband could tell something was wrong even though I didn’t know what was wrong. And what she told me was helpful.
Don’t wait for negative thoughts to come to practice positive self talk. Positive self talk is something that can be done all of the time, especially if you’re in a place like I am—struggling with self-worth, especially as a result of postpartum depression. Think positively about yourself throughout the day.
I am a great mom. I am talented. I look good in this outfit. I am making great strides in becoming more active by taking this walk. I am pretty. I am a wonderful wife. I am smart. I am thoughtful.
Hit up the comments with something positive about yourself!
