I've been thinking... Is this something I should just become comfortable with about myself or something I should worry about and try to change? Is being socially reserved a bad thing? I'm ok with one or two people, but beyond that I kind of shut down. Is being quiet ok? Does it impact me negatively? I'm ok with just enjoying listening, but I worry about coming across as weird or stuck up.
As I get older, I don't get intimidated as often. I am comfortable with me, with my likes and dislikes, I'm ok with being me. Is being quiet me? Should I embrace it as just my personality or do I need to change?
Specifically in social work or school situations with big groups I feel the same way. I don't want to appear as a slacker. My work proves I am not. I voice my opinion in other ways, but big meetings or large classes make me disappear inside my shell. I hope it doesn't impact me negatively, but I worry about that. Some people are extroverts and some are introverts, but does everyone understand that? I always hope my performance and track record would prove that my quietness is no indicator of being a slacker, because I am not.
I guess I'm just voicing my worries here tonight. I hate the nervousness and anxiety that being socially shy brings. I've gotten better, but I don't know how others do it so naturally. So what do you think...is quietness a personality trait or a flaw?
I think it is a good quality. I am a listener and come across people who will tell me their life story because I show no judgement and listen. I think if you show confidence in your abilities you don't necessarily need to be loud and center stage. Always stand up for yourself in a confident manner and enjoy listening to what others have to say. I personally think that there are enough loud talkers in the world and we need more thoughtful reserve people. It's just my opinion and thoughts.
ReplyDeleteI think it is a personality trait and definitely not a flaw. Just as you worry about how quiet you are, I worry about how loud, talkative, and extroverted I am! Lol Most of the time, I seem to make friends super easily, people feel comfy around me, and I'm okay with who I am. At other times, though, I worry that I am coming across as silly and unintelligent or pushy and know-it-all with my incessant yapping. I always end up being the class clown who is the center of attention or the one who has a strong opinion about the topic being discussed. I can't IMAGINE a world full of everyone being like me! Annoying! :) However, I notice because I'm such an extrovert and seem to "tell all" that others tend to confide in me things that would be embarrassing for them to tell a person who isn't quite as open with their own personal life. I think this world takes all kinds of people, and I definitely don't view shy/quiet as weak!
ReplyDeleteI am socially shy, or maybe I used to be. I have gotten much better with age. I still don't want to be the center of attention and I like small groups much better. I really think if you are happy with yourself, you're great!
ReplyDeleteI absolutely think its a trait. And like Staci, I don't see it as a flaw. If everyone was gregarious and outgoing, the world would be a very noisy place!!
ReplyDeleteIt is absolutely okay. I am very much an introvert and very shy in public. I am confident, however and people see that. Quiet strength can actually say a lot.
ReplyDeleteRead the book Quiet the power of introverts in a noisy world. It's very good and changes shyness into a great quality.
ReplyDeleteIt's not a bad quality at all. We (I'm an introvert also) have lots to offer the world and have strengths that extroverts don't possess. Check out this Ted Talk http://youtu.be/c0KYU2j0TM4 by Susan Cain.
ReplyDeleteIts something I do as well and have to say its something I worry about. Sometimes I wish I could speak up more and say what I want to say. But being a good listener is also a good thing, it means when you say stuff it means more. Its not talking for sake of talking. So try see it as a positive and embrace it and you'll find your confidence will grow.
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